Separation is a ‘Blessing’

Once you do embark upon the separation or divorce process, it is very important to remember three key things: Be kind, be reasonable, be brief. Remember that this person will no longer be your spouse, but he or she will continue to be your co-parent, family member, and perhaps business partner in certain assets or entities.

Laura Wasser

This powerful Statement by Laura Wasser is a progressive approach to separation.

Divorce’ is deemed as an cardinal sin amongst orthodox populations across all religious group. Estranged couples, either separated or in the process of attaining separation, are often looked down with utter disgust and are more prone to being social outcast.

To opt for separation is a very personal decision taken by two mutually consented adults who are capable enough to understand their responsibilities and life as well as management to co-parent their child. I believe that marriage is beautiful union of two souls, but what’s the use of such a matrimony when the couple are just not happy at all. Many would ask, ‘Why get married in the first place, if couples eventually get separated?’

I would like to say, Marriage is neither a guarantee card for ‘Happily Ever After’ nor a solution to all the problems. Marriage is a different world where you find happiness in yourself and your partner. It’s not always about having sex, it’s also about accepting each other with all imperfection which is often overlooked. Whether you are opting for arrange marriage or a love marriage, fights and disagreements are bound to happen but if there is loss of love, and mutual trust and respect cease to exist, the marriage looses it’s spark.

What happens when you try stretching the rubber band from both ends with strong force? IT BREAKSWe, as a society, try our level best to push the couple to work on their failed marriage. The end result is nothing but catastrophe. Most of the time, we are ourselves responsible for stigmatizing them to feel bad about their actions.Unhappy married couples leaving under same rood is a perfect recipe of disaster to shrunk the psychological development of a child, leading to severe outcome.

It’s definitely not easy for them to see their warring parents. They sense the drama around very easily and imitates their parent’s action, feeding their impressionable mind. I agree, Divorce does have an impact on kids and worse, they are constantly under pressure to choose between either of the parents when dispute takes an ugly turn. But when they live with their parents who are separated and independent yet share a cordial bond, children tend to grow and mature, they develop the understanding of love and affection more easily and essentially turn less bitter. They learn pretty early that it is possible to be friends even after moving out of marriage.

Think about it, isn’t it better for kids to  have a emotionally healthy life with two separately yet befriending parents rather then living with an unhappy and warring parents?

Termination of marriages and subsequent separation offers people an opportunity to reassess their life to figure out what went wrong from their part, treasure the good memories associated with the person, and restart an new chapter with vigour . Spend time in solitude, begin to love themselves in true sense, work on getting rid of emotions that no longer serves any purpose.

The process, no doubt, is agonizing, you’re likely to see hidden emotions coming to surface, so that it gets healed completely and create more new space for new energy and new motivation to help you move forward.

Whether you want to be a better person seeking happiness or be a bitter person wallowing in persecution to inspire sympathy: it’s a choice no one else but you who has to make.

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